New Addition

Hi every one,, I added to my Picture pages, One of the things that I added was a powerpoint together last year when I was bored out of my mind.

Go to the My Picture tab, there you will see “ourlife.ppt” click on that, it will take a bit of time to load, there is music with it so you might want to put headphones on or turn the volumne down, when the music starts click the page down arrow>>>>>>over there>>> til you get the pic of me and Stu, from there the powerpoint will run itself. Hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed putting it together, it still brings tears to my eyes.

The Song is by Bon Jovi it is called “Thank you for loving me” below are the lyrics

Thank You For Loving Me
It’s hard for me to say the things
I want to say sometimes
There’s no one here but you and me
And that broken old street light
Lock the doors
We’ll leave the world outside
All I’ve got to give to you
Are these five words when I

Chorus:
Thank you for loving me
For being my eyes
When I couldn’t see
For parting my lips
When I couldn’t breathe
Thank you for loving me
Thank you for loving me

I never knew I had a dream
Until that dream was you
When I look into your eyes
The sky’s a different blue
Cross my heart
I wear no disguise
If I tried, you’d make believe
That you believed my lies

Chorus:
Thank you for loving me
For being my eyes
When I couldn’t see
For parting my lips
When I couldn’t breathe
Thank you for loving me

You pick me up when I fall down
You ring the bell before they count me out
If I was drowning you would part the sea
And risk your own life to rescue me

Solo

Lock the doors
We’ll leave the world outside
All I’ve got to give to you
Are these five words when I

Chorus:
Thank you for loving me
For being my eyes
When I couldn’t see
You parted my lips
When I couldn’t breathe
Thank you for loving me

When I couldn’t fly
Oh, you gave me wings
You parted my lips
When I couldn’t breathe
Thank you for loving me
Bon jovi

Shame on Me

Sorry everyone, it was a long day yesterday and I forgot to post.

I got the full dose treatment and now its just a matter of waiting for all of my blood counts to go down and then recover, between now and then I have to get bloodwork done once a week and when they start getting too low, its transfusion time. Will let my local friends know when I start needing blood so they can donate for me.. (I’ll need a refill of Virgie platlets). Then to top it off I chipped a tooth so today was spent at the dentist, what fun that was.

Anyway so far so good biggest side effect with this treatment besides the blood count issue is,,, ready for this? Freaking Fatique,, sighhhhhhh like I haven’t had enough of fatique to last me forever.

So this has been the exciting daily report for me,, ain’t life grand?

Waiting

Waiting for a phone call that everything is a go, it could come in the next 1/2 hour or the next 2 hours,, I hate waiting. Will post back once I get the call or when I get home.

TGIF

Well it is another week gone by, finally . Had to go get scans done yesterday to make sure the crap they gave me on Tuesday is going where it is supposed to.

We got our refund today and I spent half of it paying bills online this morning, easy come, easy go. but the bills are paid til the end of next month. so that is one less burden to worry about.

If all goes well next Tuesday I get the full dose of crap and I will be radioactive for a bit, Stu wants to buy a blacklight and see if I glow in the dark, he is such a smart ass sometimes, no wonder I love him so much. He keeps me laughing when all I want to do is cry.

No more pity parties for me if I can help it, I have decided to change my way of thinking and when this starts to bother me I am going to get mad, angry at it and boost my inner strenght to fight this shit and kick it ass once and for all.  Getting stressed and depressed doesn’t do me one bit of good.

Well I am off in search of food, its past breakfast and almost time for lunch

Finally

Finally got a phone call at 9:30 that everything was on for getting the initial treatment, of course this is after is have been snowing, with sleet and freezing rain falling since 6 am. It took an hour + to make a 30 minute drive, then a 2 hour drive back 4 hours later, grrrrrrrrr,  what a freaking day, My blood pressure was actually up for once in my life. Stu laughs because my BP is so low normally he says they should hold a mirror under my nose to make sure I am breathing. ’smart ass’. Any way yesterday was a long and stressful day. Now as long as things go good next Tuesday I get the full and final dose for this treatment, and just wait for my blood counts to drop, ( no sharp knives for me for a while) and then wait for them to recover. Dr said probably about 4 to 5 months before I will get admitted for the SCT. This gives me time to get my house in order.

Thats all folks…BTW Happy Valentines’s Day!!!

Don’t hurt yourself laughing

 I was in the store buying a large bag of Purina for my dog and was in line
to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog…….Duh!

I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her no, I was starting
The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn’t because I’d ended up
in the hospital last time, but that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in
an intensive care unit with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and
IV’s in both arms. Her eyes about bugged out of her head.

I went on and on with the bogus diet story and she was totally buying it.
I told her that it was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works
is to load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or
two every time you feel hungry.

The package said the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try
it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now
enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.

Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me and was
that why I ended up in the hospital.

I said no….I’d been sitting in the street licking my butt when a car hit
me.

I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out the door.

(I had to share this with you all, I am still laughing)

Frustrated

I got up, woke up, got dressed, ready to leave, and suddenly the phone rings…..

It is someone from Nuclear Medicine, they have to postpone the treatment today, because the dose of Zevalin that was made up for me, did not pass Quality Control. So I get to wait another week before we get this show on the road.

ARRRGH, this is so not right, I had myself all set in my mind to get this started and got a damn red flag..Damn, damn, damn it.

So we wait another week, the only good thing is it postpones the SCT back too, which is fine by me.

Stu and I went to breakfast at IHOP, I had a big plate of Biscuits and Gravy, sausage links and hashbrowns, and a gallon of coffee (well maybe not that much )

thats all my news for now.

Gentlemen start your engines

Ok we are about to get this trip underway again,, I go for the inital induction of the Zevalin/Rituxan  treatment on Tuesday, I get to see my Dr again to get a ballpark time frame before I get admitted for the SCT.  I have approval to get my siblings tested to see if they are a match. So hopefully I will have some more information to post come Wednesday.

Things have been quiet around here, but thats nothing new.  I did pull my head out of my butt. Lord I hate when the feelings of desperation take over, but I guess it is to be expected.  I know in my heart that I can survive this trip, but I think sometimes the little girl in me takes over and just wants her mom and dad to make it all better, or make it all go away. 

I am strong, I can do this, I have my friends and family rooting for me.